DOPE BOY CHRONICLES – EPISODE #1.26 – THE OLD FART

Copyright ©2020 by Creole Gaudet. All rights reserved.

No part of this chronicle may be reproduced or transmitted in any form or by any means, electronic or mechanical, including photocopying, recording, or by an information storage and retrieval system – except by a reviewer who may quote brief passages in a review to be printed in a magazine or newspaper – without permission in writing from the publisher, Creole Gaudet.


THE W – JIMMY JOHN’S RESTROOM – 12:10 p.m.

It was minimal. Three urinals, two sinks, and on the other side were three toilet stalls. Sway had followed me into the last one.

“What are we doing?”

“Sit on the toilet.”

“Sit…?”

“Take down your pants and sit.” She reached for a liner from the carton and placed it atop the seat.

I lowered onto the crinkly paper. “What are you about to do?”

“Taste some of that sweet nut… That’s going to be my dessert.”

She pulled two more from the box, placing them on the floor in front of me. She kneeled, going straight for my sack. “This is fucking crazy! Someone’s going to need to come in here.” Sway jerked and stroked me. Her tongue was under my tip. I began to feel it. “Fuck…”

“Give it to me, daddy.”

“I’m about to…”

As the door creaked, Sway hurriedly climbed on top of me. “You didn’t lock it?”

“I thought you did. You were behind me.”

A voice spoke. “Hey there, fella. You don’t mind a little company, do you?” He took the stall directly next to us.

“Uh… No… Go ahead, no problem.”

“What’s that? What you say?”

“Go ahead!”

Sway was holding on; her knees were digging into my thighs. With her pussy in front of me, I jokingly took a bite. “Ooh…” She covered her mouth, slapping me across the shoulder.

“Having a problem, bud? Sounds like you could use a little fiber in your diet.”

“I’m okay.”

“I didn’t hear you? This damn hearing aid…”

“I said I’m okay!”

“Ahhh… Yahhhh…” His shit plopped and splashed into the bowl. The smell instantly flooded the room. “That’s how you do it, fella.”

“Andre, I’m about to puke.”

He continued. “That’s when you’re regular!”

“Let me up, Sway.” She took cover near the corner. I stood, pulling up my pants.”

The old man cranked out another load. “Yaaahhhh… Phew… That about hurt right there, I tell you what. I’m going to be out of here before you. How are you doing over there, fella?”

“I’m okay… Just finishing up.”

He laughed. “Try some prunes. That’s always worked for me. I’m eighty-two and I’m still flowing free as a teenager.”

“Yeah, thank you, sir.” I flushed, opened the stall, and headed for the door. I peeped out.

“I surely hope you’re a hand washer!” Between the frame, I could see a blue eye shining at me. His gray brow was angrily furrowed.

“Yes, sir!” I scrambled, holding my hands under the running water.

“There you are, son. We can’t spread germs. You were about to go out there and eat your meal.”

As he turned away, I looked to Sway, giving her the signal. She darted out.

“Hey! I saw that! What’s going on in here?!”

Our heads were hung low as we speed-walked across the restaurant. We were approaching the exit when we heard him shouting, “Stop those two! They were in here messing around! Funny business, I tell you what!”


HOME – 3:37 p.m.

“I’m about to go and pick up. Do you need anything while I’m out?”

“I don’t think so. Let me check the food.” Sway peeked into the refrigerator. “We’re good for a couple days.”

“Okay… I won’t be long.”

“How far do you have to go?”

“Garland. At the Chevron. It’ll be quick; in and out. The only thing that would hold me would be traffic, and today is Saturday, so…”

“Okay… I’ll be worried though. You know that, right?” Sway stepped slowly to me. She hugged. “I’m always worried when you’re gone.”

“I’m good, baby. I already told you I’ve been fucking with these Mexicans for years. Nothing to worry about… I’ll call you when I’m on my way back.”

“Okay.”

“Let me get out of here.”

“You got everything?”

“My phone, the cash, my keys, and my wallet. I’m good.”


GARLAND – CHEVRON NEAR SHILOH ROAD – 4:06 p.m.

I was parked at the air and water hoses, checking my tire pressure, when the black Suburban pulled alongside. The passenger window lowered. “Hey, my friend. I got bad news.”

I was slightly panicked. “What’s up?”

We shook hands, making the transaction. “I’m going to be out for a while.”

“What? For how long?”

“A month or two, at least.”

“That long?”

“Yes, until shit calms down.”

“What happened?”

“It’s hot right now. You should be careful.”

“Well, let me stack up, brother. You got any more with you? I’ll take it.”

“That’s all, my friend.”

“What about later? Can I meet up with you later?”

“Everything is promised out already. I call you, you no answer. I say well…”

“Yeah, I know, that’s on me… You got anybody else? One of your people?”

“No, this is everywhere. But you got the cut. Wait a week or two, and they will be glad to have that. You can charge whatever.”

“Okay, I appreciate you, bro… Let me know when.”

“I got you, my friend.”

I watched as he drove away, knowing I was in trouble. I’d always had money stacked away. Not this time, though.

I went inside, searched the boxes for a Popsicle. I grabbed a grape, paid for it, and went back to the car. I relaxed against the front fender with my leg across the hood and unwrapped the packaging.

I took my time and enjoyed it.

Creole Gaudet

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LIBERTINE DREAMS – WHAT DO YOU DO WHEN YOU SEE YOUR GIRLFRIEND OUT ON A DATE WITH ANOTHER GUY?

Copyright ©2012 by Creole Gaudet. All rights reserved
No part of this story may be reproduced or transmitted in any form or by any means, electronic or mechanical, including photocopying, recording, or by an information storage and retrieval system – except by a reviewer who may quote brief passages in a review to be printed in a magazine or newspaper – without permission in writing from the publisher, Creole Gaudet.


You’re sitting home alone, wondering how you’re going to spend your Saturday evening. It’s been a busy work week, and you haven’t spent much time with your girlfriend outside of a couple of sleepovers during the week. You miss her. You figure it would be nice to spend some quality time together; maybe go out for dinner and catch that chick flick she’s been hinting about.

You grab your phone, tap the dial button, and wait. As it rings, you reminisce back six months ago when the two of you met and how glad you are to have her in your life. Just as you start drafting a message, she answers.

“Hey, babe, how are you?”

You’re smiling already at the sound of her voice. “Hey, hon, I was thinking that maybe we could get out tonight; get something to eat, and then head over to the movie theater. We can see the one you’ve been talking about. It doesn’t start until eight-thirty. We have plenty of time.”

“That’s so sweet, but I’m really tired…” She yawns loudly. “I’m really wanting to just stay in and get some rest.”

“Oh… Well, maybe we can get together tomorrow or something.”

“Yeah, that sounds good. Let’s do that.”

“Okay, well…”

“What are you going to do? Are you going out?”

“Nah, I’ll just watch some TV or something.”

“Are you sure?”

“Yeah, why?”

“I was just asking, that’s all.”

“Are you okay? You sound out of breath.”

“Uh, I’m changing into my pajamas.”

“You’re going to bed already? Wow.”

“I’m just so tired.”

“Well, get some rest, sweetheart.”

“Okay, goodnight.”

You’re in front of the big screen, eating a burger and fries, intermittently chasing it with a cola while flipping through the channels. Basketball season is over, and the NFL preseason hasn’t even begun yet. After a couple of hours, you get annoyed.

You walk out on your balcony. The sun is setting. The weather’s nice. You have a change of mind. You feel some guilt going out alone, but it was she who begged off, and she’s surely asleep by now.

You decide to hop through a few bars just to see who’s out, maybe have a beer or two, and go to the movies anyway. Instead, you’re going for that action film you’ve had your eyes on.

You hit the shower, towel off, and head to the closet. You pull out a light blue pair of denims and lay a matching T-shirt across them just for looks. You pick out a belt, and you already know which pair of shoes will bring it all together.

You arrive at the local row of taverns where all the cool people hang out. Your favorite bartender already has your brand in hand as you grab an open stool. You two pass gestures as he pops the cap, placing it on the coaster in front of you.

As your eyes pan the crowd, you catch a gander at the couple walking in. For some reason, you find an immediate attraction to the female. You look closer. Something is all of a sudden out of place in your world. The planets have just misaligned. You’re now questioning reality.

You cannot believe your eyes. It’s your girlfriend out with another guy. You look at that bottle you’re drinking from and then back to your buddy, thinking that he must have dropped something in your drink. You’re expecting him to be eyeing you for a reaction to the Mickey he’d just slipped you. No, he’s doing what he was doing when you walked in. He’s serving drinks. Besides, you both went to high school together, and you know he’d never do anything like that.

You hesitantly look again, hoping to see something different because this could not be the same girl that you’d just gotten off the phone with only a few hours ago. Not the same girl who claimed she was so tired that she was heading straight to bed.

You try to rationalize things in your head. Maybe this is just a friend she’s with, a cousin…or maybe her brother. Maybe she didn’t want to tell you she was going out with him because you probably wouldn’t have understood. Yeah, that must be it, right?

You watch as he pulls out her chair before heading to the bar for drinks. She casually looks your way, and the two of you lock eyes. For all of five seconds, you’re frozen.

The mask of shock and guilt confirms that this guy is not just a friend or even a relative.

There’s heaviness in your chest, your nerves are tingling, and the fluttering butterflies in your stomach have razors for wings.

As you try to get your legs to stop trembling, you wonder what to do next.

Do you run over and make your presence known, getting angry at the guy like some men would? You know, blaming the other victim? That’s right, the other guy’s a victim too.

What do you do?

The simple answer is you do nothing. That’s right. If you get mad, causing a scene, you will validate her in ways you can’t imagine. Many women love to get it going between two guys. They feel a sort of self-worth when men fight over them.

No matter how bad it stings, don’t let her think you’re weak and that she’s hurt you. If you have to get yourself together, head to the can, enter a stall, lock the door, and let it out. That way, she can’t dip away from her date and try to do damage control when you’re mentally unprepared.

Go back and take your seat at the bar. Get yourself another beer or maybe something a little stiffer to lean on. Just be cool.

Now this is important. Whatever you do, do not look her way, not even on your way out.

Most likely, she’ll contact you right away. She will probably ask if you’re mad or upset. Stupid question, right? But you have to turn it all around. The relationship you thought you had is now a game. You can either tell her to jump off the nearest cliff or play along.

Of course, she’s going to try to justify it by saying that it didn’t mean anything. But counter with it was only a friendship, and no one said that you two couldn’t see other people.

She can’t then say the both of you were committed because that would mean she was caught cheating. At this point, she has no grounds; nothing to stand on.

In an attempt to win you back, she may want to come over and talk to you in person. She’s hoping to use her beauty and charm to seduce you.

But don’t give her the opportunity. Take her out to all her favorite places and avoid talking about the incident. Cut her off each time she tries to bring it up. The goal is to trigger memories of the good times that the two of you’ve shared and to make her realize what she’s done.

If she decides she wants to spend the night, let her.

However, under no circumstances do you let her touch you sexually in any way whatsoever. Do not even kiss her or let her kiss you. She does not deserve you. She has to earn that back over time.

But don’t wait for her, move on and start dating other women.

Now here comes the fun part. Let’s say you’re entertaining company and she calls, wanting to drop by. Why not let her? Don’t even give her a heads-up. Just let her in. It’s a friendship, remember?

You never know, the two of them may even get along. Now you’ll have two girls competing for you. The new girl is not going to let your old girlfriend come and move her out of her position, and the old one is not going to let the newbie take her spot. Take them both out, go back home, and hang out. See what happens.

You just may end up with both.

Creole Gaudet

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