Copyright ©2020 by Creole Gaudet. All rights reserved.
No part of this chronicle may be reproduced or transmitted in any form or by any means, electronic or mechanical, including photocopying, recording, or by an information storage and retrieval system – except by a reviewer who may quote brief passages in a review to be printed in a magazine or newspaper – without permission in writing from the publisher, Creole Gaudet.
It was 4:30 a.m. when we decided to call it. We’d showered, tidied up a bit, put away the coke, and had gotten under the covers.
After watching several episodes of ‘Storage Wars Northern Treasures’, we turned off the TV to get some rest.
We were lying quietly in the dark with only the streetlights illuminating through the open curtains. “What was it like being you growing up, Andre? Tell me about it.”
“I never knew my father… I’d lost my mother when I was very young, which left me with my grandmother. She was my mother’s mother.”
“How was that?”
“She smoked crack… I guess you could say that…she was there but not really there. I was a burden, and she’d sometimes take it out on me. She didn’t hit me or anything like that, but she was verbally abusive. I guess she didn’t ask to have to raise me.”
“Do you think that had an influence on you…as far as you getting into the game?”
“Oh, no doubt. I used to see the dealers when they would deliver. Iced out, driving nice cars, and were always fresh.
“I never wanted to be like them. I’ve always wanted to be my own legit boss, and I will, but it’s what I ended up doing anyway. It’s just to get my bank up… What about you? How was your life?”
“The total opposite. I had both my parents and a younger sister. Typical racist, religious hypocrites. They’d never admit it, though.”
“What about your singing? Was that your dream?”
“No, not at first. I hadn’t discovered that yet. I wanted to be a gymnast. I was about six or seven, I think. They were going to the schools looking for students. I begged my mother to let me study.
“She even took me to the first class. Andre, I had so much fun. I loved it.
“But when we got home, I could hear her telling my dad about it, and they came into my room and told me that we didn’t have the money right now.
“I was crushed, and for three nights I cried myself to sleep.
“One day, the school called, wondering what happened and why I wasn’t there. They even offered to teach me for free because I showed so much potential, but my dad’s excuse was that the family didn’t take charity.
“But the real reason was that the owner of the school was black.”
“Are you serious?”
“I didn’t get to be a student of an Olympic Medal winner because she was black.”
“When was the last time you talked to your family?”
“After what Rosebud and Mandy did, I tried calling them to… I guess to explain. I was probably trying to ask for help, but I didn’t know how. My sister answered, and we were talking. They took the phone away from her and hung up on me.
“I didn’t have a way for her to reach me. All I had was Mandy’s phone, and I wasn’t going to have her call me on it. I wanted her to know what happened so that I could warn her of how… I don’t want her to get caught up like I did, you know?”
“I know. It’s going to be okay, though. You have to believe that.”
“I don’t want to think about that right now. I care about you. You took a chance on me when my own mother and father turned their backs.”
“And it’s the best move I’ve ever made in my life. This is the happiest I’ve ever been.”
Sway crawled onto my chest, looking me in my eyes. “I want to do something, Andre. I don’t want to live off you. You’re never going to keep me around.”
“I want to take care of you, Sway, and I want you to be around forever.”
“But… I’m not… I haven’t even given myself to you…physically. I don’t even know how to. You’re not a pimp… If we fuck, it’s like… I don’t want you to think I’m playing you for a trick.
“I’ll do whatever you tell me to do. You can do whatever you want with me.”
“I want to see you find you. Whatever it is you want out of life, I want you to have that.”
“I don’t even know how all this works. How can this be? I’ve only dreamed of a man like you. You’re going somewhere. Somebody’s going to wake me up, and I’m going to be very pissed off. You can’t be real, Andre. There is no way.
“You won’t let me whore for you. You’re taking care of me better than I even deserve. I’m not used to any of this.”
“You’re going to have to get that pimp mentality out of your head. I get that they’ve convinced you that everybody is in it to use everyone else; that used or be used bullshit. It’s not true, Sway.”
“I believe that in my heart, but I thought it was just me.”
“I want one woman and one woman only. I want it all. I want love. The highest level of love there is. Whatever that may be. I want to go for that. One hundred percent dedication. I want someone that I’d be willing to put my life on the line for… Aw, Sway, there you are with the crying again.”
“It’s because what you’re saying is beautiful. I’m fucking happy, alright?!”
I laughed. “Well, let’s keep doing that. Let’s be happy.”
“I love you, Andre.”
“I love you, too.”
She wiped her eyes. “Where do we go from here?”
“I say we make it official. Sway, would you do me the honor of being my lady?”
“Yes! If you will have me, Andre, I will be your everything forever and ever.”
“I’m yours, Sway. Forever and ever.” Our lips met. We began kissing passionately. I could hear our heartbeats sync in rhythm. We released. “What’s wrong?”
“I was about to ask you.”
“It’s just not right, is it?”
She smiled. “No.”
“I want more from this than… I don’t know how to explain it…”
“Like it should be a special moment.”
“Yes…”
“That’s exactly what I feel, too! I want you fully. I want all of you. I want it to be natural. I’ve never been with a man without a condom. I want to feel you.”
“Let’s wait… Let’s take our time.”
“We can go and get tested. And then it can be real, special. Like married people.”
“Funny, you said that. I was just thinking about something.”
“What?”
“Your name.”
“Are you teasing me again?”
“No, I’m thinking about what your name would be.”
“Sway Swain?”
“Yes! That shit is lit; on gang!”
Creole Gaudet
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